two-e

I am in a dating recession. Mostly because I am so damn picky and partly because I am not in the mood to play the game that goes along with the getting to know you week. The texts, calls, yada, yada. I also haven't been asked out in a while either so I said what the hell when I was given a business card on my flight to London.

We emailed back and forth with my trip to Portland and his to London in between when we actually met to when we arranged to meet up. I used Dave May's tactic of just communicating through email. I like it because I am not obligued to answer the phone or respond immediately as a text prompts.

We decided on a day and I let him pick the place as he would be coming from work and I would come from dog walking. He chose a place called Galway Hooker on 36th. Joy, same place Chris took me on our "turn around date" and first kissed me. Yes, I am familar with the place I say, what time would you like to meet? He tells me between 6:30 and 7:00. I look at the clock as I am leaving my place and send him a quick email that I will be closer to the later time but I am on my way. When I get out of the subway at 34th, I receive an email that he had just left the office. We should have showed up with in minutes of each other.

I arrive at 6:50 and make a pass through the bar. I didn't see him so I found a bar stool near the door and began to read "Home and Away" an Irish pub paper. I looked up every time the door opened and after a drink and twenty minutes I began to plan a place to take myself to dinner. The bartender came over and gave me another drink and a sympathic smile. It took me until 1935 to finish it and decide this is what I get for accepting a date from a guy who asked me for a massage on the airplane.

I exit the bar and walk west. He is standing there in thirty degree weather. "What are you doing?" He tells me that he waiting for me and thought he was being stood up. I explain to him I was waiting inside for him for a half an hour and now I am going to dinner. He said he emailed me and I showed him my phone to prove I hadn't received anything. He asks if he can buy me dinner and said yes, we are going Nobu. It is 21 blocks up and I started walking. He asked me if I had my eyebrow pierced,
which struck me as odd. This was the beginning of odd topics for the evening,

We make it to Nobu and ask for a table, we are kindly sat at the sushi bar (I would have scored a table). We order a few things and make small talk. I notice that he is talking quite a bit and I chalk it up to nervousness. He begins to tell me how much grain it takes to fed a cow till maturity. Mind you this guy is from NJ not Kansas, I am not sure where he got this information or why he is telling me. I respond that I like veal best and they don't take as much grain because they are killed as babies.

We finish up dinner and he wants dessert. He wants ice cream to be more specific. Fine I will walk with you to get ice cream. We walk and walk and find nothing but I do point him to a deli which has good cheesecake. He orders a slice and I order coffee counting the seconds until the end of the date. I have given up talking or trying to tell any story what so ever because it interupted and then moved onto another subject. We talk about cooking briefly and I started to tell my troubles find enchillada sauce in the city. The subject shifts suddenly to unions and people banging pots and pans. Yes, I was lost as well so I called it a night.

I told him I was taking the B uptown and going home when I was really heading over to BJ's to meet Beth. Well he decides to go the same stop but downtown. So we walk through the turn stiles me cursing him for following me as I was just going to pretend to go down and then catch a cab east bound. He is on the upper level and I need the lower level. I give him a hug good night and walk down the stairs. Mind you I am wearing a bright pink jacket so I can't just walk back up the stairs and leave. My train comes first so I take it to the next stop and grab my cab.

I am enjoying time with friends and recreating the date to their amusement when I get this email....
Subject line "did you..."
"Get home safe? I saw a huge rat on the staircase in the subway. It was kinda just hanging out. Strange. Figured I’d make sure you got on your train and weren’t carried away but rabid rodents J

I had a nice time tonight. I’m going to go with Howard Stern as my celebrity. He talks about Nobu all the time on the radio so it will be totally believable!

I just emailed my mom about the east coast enchilada sauce mystery. I’ll keep you posted."